Monday, June 11, 2012

Innate Courage, Learned Confidence


   
Many people want to learn a foreign language. Some perhaps want to travel and interact with people of other places and cultures while others desperately need the language for competitiveness in the work environment. Some people love learning foreign languages yet for others this task can be daunting. Many give up before ever beginning. Some start and stop as their courage ebbs and flows. 

Lately I’ve been thinking about courage and where it comes from. Courage is the symbol of the lion in the animal kingdom and Leo in astrology. When you see a lion proudly shake his mane and point his noise slightly skyward you can feel the power of his courage. The lion loves fearlessly and his courage gives him a regal presence. A brave heart is the source of courage.  

Defeat is the absence of heart. 

I saw that quote on a t-shirt tonight as I ran out to the store on a writing break. The universe has an uncanny way of delivering the answers we are looking for, even when we don’t realize we are asking the questions. 

My teacher and astrologer, Christopher Witecki, taught me that whatever you are going to manifest in life, you must first and foremost love it. When you love it, your heart is in it.   

Courage is an innate resource. The English word courage comes from the Latin, cor, meaning heart. Courage is, “the quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, danger, pain, etc., without fear.” (Dictionary.com) 

Courage allows us to jump into the unknown. Think about a time in your life when you bravely jumped into a brand new experience. You had no idea what to expect or what was going to happen. You fearlessly decided you wanted to do something so much that you were just going to do it. Surely it may have been challenging at some point, but the love of what you were doing gave you the courage to face it. You came out of that experience empowered by your results because you found out what you are capable of. Challenges give you the opportunity to grow and develop confidence. That confidence now allows you to face more life challenges as you continue to learn and evolve. 

Confidence is a learned skill. The English word confidence comes from the Latin, confidere, meaning with trust or faith. To have confidence means you know you are capable of meeting the challenge. You believe in yourself when you’ve proven to yourself in the past that your efforts and skills produced positive results. So essentially confidence comes from experience. 

Scott Sonnon, one of my inspirations in martial arts and mind/body training, says that courage comes first and confidence comes after the proof of past success. "Be brave. The confidence will come."

Know that you have had the courage to rise to many challenges in your past and those experiences have given you the confidence of knowing that you can accomplish what you set out to do. When your goal is to speak a foreign language, it first requires the courage to just start speaking. Of course you’ll make mistakes. You will need to look up words you don’t know, try to explain them in other terms, or even ask for help. You’ll listen to native speakers and catch only a few words or phrases here and there. Little by little, more and more comes together, and you start building confidence in your ability to use the knowledge and skills you already have and to find that which you seek.  

Of course there is that little voice in the inner dialogue that sometimes says things like, “you’re too old to learn another language,” “you’re not good at learning languages,” “you tried and gave it up before, so why bother now...” Just tell that voice in your mind to be quiet. Begin to replace your negative self-talk with positive thoughts based on courage instead of fear of defeat. Remind yourself of the successes you have had in your life, the skills you developed and the inner resources that you tapped into as a result of your struggle. Those successes are the source of your confidence to keep moving forward. 

By courageously facing new experiences in life, you learn and grow. As you develop greater confidence in yourself, you continue to reach out for new opportunities when they present themselves. New experiences lead to expanded perceptions of yourself and life.